Life is difficult...

Untangling life together

Now I know why I feel like I do, I recognise what triggers me and that's allowed me to gain control"

I've never felt good enough but now I feel I am"

I didn't want sympathy, I wanted someone who understood me"
I just kept repeating the same behavior again and again. Now I understand why and I'm working on breaking the cycle" 
To the outside world I had it all, so why did I feel so insignificant and like it would all slip away? Now I understand why"

What's it all about?

It's ok to not have it figured out 

There’s a reason you clicked onto this website and the chances are it’s not been an easy decision to make.

 

It may be that you have something specific you want to talk about, you may want to calm the negative thoughts that are going around your head or you may be looking to find help for someone you care about. Perhaps when you just want someone who will listen to you, a space to off-load where there is no worry about saying the wrong thing, or fear of being judged. When feeling like you are being an imposition. Whatever your reason for being here we hope you find the help you need.

Counselling For You is here to help when you are ready to take the next step, fill out the contact form below and we’ll be in touch to arrange a chat.  There is no commitment to make an appointment to begin counselling, as you may want to think about it or you may not feel we are the right fit for you, these decisions are yours. We feel it’s important that you are comfortable with what we can offer you so the counselling relationship we build has the best opportunity to become established and we can start untangling your life together.

Counselling is also a space for personal self-development, not just crisis management. Many people come to counselling who want to develop greater self-confidence, so they can move forward and be happier in their life. If you feel this is something you want, we can help you with that too. 

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading the last one
 

Practice Areas

We don’t have experience in all areas. Quite honestly it would be impossible to gain the knowledge to help all people with all things in one lifetime.

Below are some of the areas we are confident we do have the experience to help you with; it’s not an exhaustive list, but if you get in touch with us you can be assured that if we don’t have the skills you need, we will help you find someone who does.

If you need an emergency helpline click HERE to see our list of national and local agencies who you can call for immediate help.

 

We understand that the areas below are not mutually exclusive and that people rarely experience just one of these issues, in fact one can often be a doorway to another, meaning perhaps you are experiencing two or three of these issues at any one time. Please be reassured that this is completely normal.

If you would like to talk to us please call, email or complete the contact form and we will be in touch as soon as possible.

Anger

Anger can be triggered by many things, and you may not even know why you feel like you do. You may feel a like a pressure cooker bubbling up inside, and then your anger explodes in a way that leaves you feeling guilty and ashamed as it affects the people around you. Or you may be holding on so tight that it’s triggered anxiety and low self-esteem. Anger can manifest in many different ways.

Anger doesn’t have to be an unhealthy emotion but if it leaves you feeling vulnerable and unhappy about yourself then now is the time to explore what triggers your feelings, to find out where your anger is coming from so you can take back control.

People associate grief with the death of a loved one, but we also grieve other losses in our lives, including marriage, jobs, status, freedom and physical ability; it’s a long list. Grief is often accompanied by a wide range of feelings including anger, denial, confusion, guilt and sadness and these can be hard to make sense of when you are caught up in the whirlpool of emotions. No two people will experience grief in the same way, there are no rules and no time limits to how you will work through your loss. It’s not about getting over it, it’s about growing around the pain so you can, when you are ready, move forward in your life.

Self Esteem

That feeling of ‘not being good enough’ can impact you in so many ways. It may hold you back from doing things you want or grabbing the opportunities that come your way. Maybe you feel uncomfortable in social situations, putting on a façade as the ‘real you’ doesn’t belong there. Or maybe feel you have to constantly please people but that leaves you feeling taken advantage of, frustrated, worn out and angry.

We will listen to your story to learn about why you have the feelings you do and help you identify what changes you want to make. We will work together to untangle what triggers your negative thoughts, how you look at them and  build your self-belief.

Anxiety

We understand that the anxiety you are experiencing is not something you can ‘just get over’ or that you only need to ‘pull yourself together’. There are reasons you feel like you do, and you need understanding and security to be able to talk about it.

Anxiety can protect you, but when it gets out of control it can leave you feeling out of control, unable to calm down and affect your everyday life.

Depression

There are many reasons you may feel depressed, sometimes you don’t understand why, you just know that your mood, your energy levels, your behaviour and your thoughts are making you feel sad and hopeless. You may feel that people don’t like you, you are isolated and that you are fighting a lonely battle.

We will encourage you not to be so hard on yourself, to accept yourself as you are, and that you don’t need to feel guilty because you are depressed. We will give you the space and time to work out how you feel; there’s no judgement, just support.  It isn’t an easy journey and we will challenge your thinking where appropriate, so together we can’t start untangling what is going on and help you find a way out of the black hole.

Menopause

You may be feeling that a part of your life is ending, the future looks dull and the brain fog is overwhelming. Menopause can leave you feeling angry, sad, defensive, worthless and with a sense of ‘where do I go from here?’ Your relationships, both at home and at work, may be under strain as emotions engulf you and you feel nobody sees you or understands how you are feeling.

We want you to feel heard and understood. Our session will be a space for you to grieve what you feel you are losing, process your thoughts, acknowledge that your feelings are valid and to work out what you want from your future.

Relationships

Let’s be honest, relationships can be complicated. You may be experiencing problems with someone in particular or maybe you feel like an outsider and find it hard to form a relationship. Relationships have the power to influence how we see ourselves, make us doubt ourselves and can leave us feel unloved, not appreciated and frustrated which can influence our feelings and lead to anger, depression and anxiety.

We want you to be able to talk openly about how you feel, who annoys you, who has power over you and who stirs up your emotions. Or maybe you’re exhausted and just feel like you don’t matter and nobody cares. However you feel, we will give you the opportunity to look at your relationships, to open up about them and how they impact you and to find your own self-belief so you aren’t reliant on other people to feel good about yourself.

Please note we do not offer couples counselling.

LBGTQI+

Accepting your sexuality, facing discrimination or being hurt by other people’s attitudes can have a long lasting and significant impact on how you see the world. Your self-esteem, relationships and career are just some of the areas of your life that can be affected and lead to depression,  anxiety and that feeling of being judged.

We offer you time and space to be you; no judgement, no pressure, no fear of rejection. Our sessions are an opportunity for you to cry tears, be angry, explore the mixed emotions you have with the aim to find ways of coping with the challenges you have in your unique life.

Trauma & PTSD

Everyone has a different reaction to trauma, and no-one can judge what your experience of trauma is compared to someone else's because no-on else has lived your life. Trauma may leave you feeling on edge and in a constant state of hyper-awareness or you may have withdrawn from people as you try to cope. Not only does trauma affect you mentally but it can also affect you physically leaving you tired, emotional, affecting your breathing or leaving you uninterested in sex.

 This is just a snapshot of the effects of trauma, because you will be experiencing it differently to anyone else we have worked with. What we do is give you the space to talk about what you have experienced, make sense of it and how it affects you with no fear of being judged.

Young Adults

Sometimes the world can feel very confusing. People expect you to take on responsibility yet treat you like a child at times, your’re under pressure from social media and relationships with your peers are changing. You have lots of new experiences to navigate and make sense of and it’s easy to feel lost, unheard, overwhelmed and that you have nowhere to turn. Sometimes these feelings can build so much that you hurt yourself or think about suicide.

We will listen to you, more importantly we will hear what you are saying and come from your point of reference to help you make sense of your feelings, giving you the opportunity to express yourself and to explore how you feel, work out what you want and feel more in control of your life.

Teenagers

Our experience is helping 11-18 years olds and we know that if you are looking for a counsellor for your child then you are really worried; something in their life isn’t going right and you want to make it better. We will create a space for your child to be able to talk about what is going on, but this can take time. Children can be distrustful and they won’t be pushed where they don’t want to go, so we will need to prove ourselves to them and build the relationship at their pace. Part of the trust is keeping what they tell us confidential and that might be hard for you as you won’t know what they are saying and feeling, so it’s important you trust us too. You can be assured that we have a very robust process in place for safeguarding your child, as they are our priority.